Post by melindajo2000 on Dec 15, 2012 7:27:13 GMT -6
Todd was feeling pretty low. Today was the first anniversary of his granddaughter Hope's death, and he tried to throw himself into work. He tried to go about business as usual, not letting anyone know that there was something wrong. Every once in a while, he would take out a photo, the last known photo of Hope with her mother, Starr, and her grandmother, Blair. Blair didn't know he had this photo. They weren't exactly on speaking terms these days, and his relationship with Starr was, what you could say, rocky at best. He would do anything to protect his family, or so he'd sworn over the years. But when it counted, when they needed him the most, he wasn't there, and for that he would always blame himself.
He sat back in his chair and turned around, facing the window. It appeared to be a peaceful and mild day, but as he knew better than anyone, looks could be deceiving. It wasn't fair, he thought bitterly. People were going on with their lives, moving on, even Starr and Blair had their boyfriends, but what did he have really? A flirtation with Carly, whom he knew was just another version of the real Mrs. Manning. But Blair had moved on, and so Todd was trying to do the same. But tonight he knew would be the biggest challenge of his newfound freedom. He would have to get through this alone. As often as he told the world that he liked to be alone, only he-and Blair- knew that was a cover for his true feelings. But what did they care? Jack wanted nothing to do with him, and Starr and Blair were picking up the pieces of his life. So what was left for him?
He was alone, all alone, and would probably die that way. So for him, it was for the best that everyone stay away from him. Far, far away.
He was randomly scattering some papers, not really caring in which order they had been in. all he knew was that the all too familiar feeling of self-loathing was back in full force, and he was just waiting for the poor soul who fouled up today to become the target of his rage.
There was a knock on the door, to which Todd quickly bellowed...”Go away!”
Still, the doorknob was turning. Obviously the poor dolt hadn't gotten the hint. Knowing his luck it would be McBain, just looking for an excuse to screw with him.
“I didn't do anything...I swear to God...”
“I know you didn't.”
Todd was stunned by his visitor's appearance. Standing in front of him was his ex-wife, Blair.
“Blair? What do you want?”
“I thought you could use some company today,” she smiled as she brought in a picnic basket presumably loaded with all sorts of goodies.
“What the...”
“It's okay, Todd. I just came from Starr's. She's doing all right, doing as well as can be expected. She hasn't forgotten, you know.”
“Forgotten what? I don't know what you're talking about.”
“I think you do know what I'm talking about. And I'm here because...well... I brought you a peace offering. I know things haven't been good between us this year, and I thought...I don't know what I was thinking,” Blair sighed.
“What, your boyfriend didn't object to our little get-together?”.
“He knows, Todd. He knows it's you. And heaven help me, it will always be you.”
“Are you saying...”
“I don't know what I'm saying. It's too soon for me to make any decisions; all I know is that for better or worse I appear to have a soft spot for the father of my kids.”
“Well...do what I do...go with those feelings. That's what I do, look how well it's worked out for me,” he replied dryly.
Blair laughed. “Nothing's quite worked out the way we expected it to, has it Todd?”
“Certainly not my life. I never would have envisioned...this...” he tossed some more papers around. “for my life.”
“What do you want? For your life I mean? If you had one day to pick to relive from your life, what would it be?”
He didn't even think. “It would be the day in the movie theater. Remember that? How shocked you were to see me? Even then I knew that you were the one who would know the truth. I hadn't counted on a lot of things- but I knew that you would know me.”
“So sure of yourself,” she teased as she walked towards him.
“ I knew you could never forget me. Just like...well, you know.”
“Go ahead and say it. It's okay.” Now she gently touched his face, the side without his telltale scar.
“What do you want from me, Blair? I told you I loved you then you walked away from me.”
“Did you leave me any choice?”
“Whatever happened, I had reasons. You don't trust me, that's your problem.”
“Do you trust me?”
“For eight years.. eight years!!...I did nothing but trust you. And look where it's gotten me.”
“I'm sorry, Todd. I didn't think of it that way. For the past year I've been angry...so angry...and today I realized that I don't want to live that way anymore. It's not what she would have wanted.”
“Peanut?”
Blair nodded. “I still think about her...how I found you lying on the floor talking to her, playing with her toys. I tried to act like I was mad, but that exactly what it was- an act.”
“She kept me going more than sometimes even moreso thsn you or Starr. She was so innocent, so young...and I..”
“Todd stop! Don't go there. Today's not about blame. Can't we just enjoy each other's company without guilt or blame or whatever. I came because I wanted...needed ...to be with you. We can't change the past but we do have the power to change our future.”
“Do you see me in your future?” Todd pulled her close to him, catching her by surprise.
“I can't imagine you not in it,” Blair admitted, closing her eyes. Todd took his cue. He kissed her, and all sorts of old feelings came back to the both of them. She was right, Todd decided. Who knew what the future held, only that he wanted her to be in it. And she would, if today was any indication.
The end
He sat back in his chair and turned around, facing the window. It appeared to be a peaceful and mild day, but as he knew better than anyone, looks could be deceiving. It wasn't fair, he thought bitterly. People were going on with their lives, moving on, even Starr and Blair had their boyfriends, but what did he have really? A flirtation with Carly, whom he knew was just another version of the real Mrs. Manning. But Blair had moved on, and so Todd was trying to do the same. But tonight he knew would be the biggest challenge of his newfound freedom. He would have to get through this alone. As often as he told the world that he liked to be alone, only he-and Blair- knew that was a cover for his true feelings. But what did they care? Jack wanted nothing to do with him, and Starr and Blair were picking up the pieces of his life. So what was left for him?
He was alone, all alone, and would probably die that way. So for him, it was for the best that everyone stay away from him. Far, far away.
He was randomly scattering some papers, not really caring in which order they had been in. all he knew was that the all too familiar feeling of self-loathing was back in full force, and he was just waiting for the poor soul who fouled up today to become the target of his rage.
There was a knock on the door, to which Todd quickly bellowed...”Go away!”
Still, the doorknob was turning. Obviously the poor dolt hadn't gotten the hint. Knowing his luck it would be McBain, just looking for an excuse to screw with him.
“I didn't do anything...I swear to God...”
“I know you didn't.”
Todd was stunned by his visitor's appearance. Standing in front of him was his ex-wife, Blair.
“Blair? What do you want?”
“I thought you could use some company today,” she smiled as she brought in a picnic basket presumably loaded with all sorts of goodies.
“What the...”
“It's okay, Todd. I just came from Starr's. She's doing all right, doing as well as can be expected. She hasn't forgotten, you know.”
“Forgotten what? I don't know what you're talking about.”
“I think you do know what I'm talking about. And I'm here because...well... I brought you a peace offering. I know things haven't been good between us this year, and I thought...I don't know what I was thinking,” Blair sighed.
“What, your boyfriend didn't object to our little get-together?”.
“He knows, Todd. He knows it's you. And heaven help me, it will always be you.”
“Are you saying...”
“I don't know what I'm saying. It's too soon for me to make any decisions; all I know is that for better or worse I appear to have a soft spot for the father of my kids.”
“Well...do what I do...go with those feelings. That's what I do, look how well it's worked out for me,” he replied dryly.
Blair laughed. “Nothing's quite worked out the way we expected it to, has it Todd?”
“Certainly not my life. I never would have envisioned...this...” he tossed some more papers around. “for my life.”
“What do you want? For your life I mean? If you had one day to pick to relive from your life, what would it be?”
He didn't even think. “It would be the day in the movie theater. Remember that? How shocked you were to see me? Even then I knew that you were the one who would know the truth. I hadn't counted on a lot of things- but I knew that you would know me.”
“So sure of yourself,” she teased as she walked towards him.
“ I knew you could never forget me. Just like...well, you know.”
“Go ahead and say it. It's okay.” Now she gently touched his face, the side without his telltale scar.
“What do you want from me, Blair? I told you I loved you then you walked away from me.”
“Did you leave me any choice?”
“Whatever happened, I had reasons. You don't trust me, that's your problem.”
“Do you trust me?”
“For eight years.. eight years!!...I did nothing but trust you. And look where it's gotten me.”
“I'm sorry, Todd. I didn't think of it that way. For the past year I've been angry...so angry...and today I realized that I don't want to live that way anymore. It's not what she would have wanted.”
“Peanut?”
Blair nodded. “I still think about her...how I found you lying on the floor talking to her, playing with her toys. I tried to act like I was mad, but that exactly what it was- an act.”
“She kept me going more than sometimes even moreso thsn you or Starr. She was so innocent, so young...and I..”
“Todd stop! Don't go there. Today's not about blame. Can't we just enjoy each other's company without guilt or blame or whatever. I came because I wanted...needed ...to be with you. We can't change the past but we do have the power to change our future.”
“Do you see me in your future?” Todd pulled her close to him, catching her by surprise.
“I can't imagine you not in it,” Blair admitted, closing her eyes. Todd took his cue. He kissed her, and all sorts of old feelings came back to the both of them. She was right, Todd decided. Who knew what the future held, only that he wanted her to be in it. And she would, if today was any indication.
The end
