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Post by jessie on Jul 10, 2012 19:30:39 GMT -6
Chapter 18
Jessie ran in the house, and changed, and brushed her hair. She was so excited about going out with Ray, she heard Ray come in the house, and yell out her name.
Jessie grabbed her bag, and ran down the hall, and Ray was in the kitchen having a drink of water.
"Hi Ray I'm ready to go out, guess who came here today, we had a wonderful talk"?
"Who"?
"Miss Ellie, and Mr. Ewing, they actually said I can call Grandma and Grandpa"
"What did they want"?
"They wanted to see if I was OK, it is OK Ray, they were really nice"
"Good lets get going we will go to the bookstore first, than we can do some shopping at the mall, and than grab a pizza or go to that little diner just 1 mile down the street"
"I would like the diner"
"OK the diner it is but lets go it is getting late". They left, Jessie was talking away in the truck Ray smiled she was truly happy, and he enjoyed seeing her this way. They got to the bookstore, and they went inside, and Ray told her to go pick 3 or 4 books, he was going to check out the mysteries, and they should grab a couple of cook books too."
"OK I will be over by the romance books". Jessie walked over , and she didn't know where to start. She was reading the back of some books, and finally picked 3, and ran over to Ray saying she picked her books. He had a couple of mysteries, they walked over to the cook books, and Jessie was looking when Ray laughed, and grabbed a cookbook that said Cooking for Dummies. He handed the book to Jessie , and smiled.
"Here is a good book for you Jessie"
Jessie took it, but Ray saw the smile on her face disappear, and she whispered, "I'm not stupid Ray"
"What they are popular they have easy recipes, and it would be good for me too"
Jessie smiled, "So your a Dummy too". Ray hugged her, and whispered, "I'm sorry you thought I was trying to hurt your feelings, these books are in half the homes in United States or Worldwide actually"
"Well if they are easy I will like it, but I'm not a Dummy"
They smile as they walk up to the front, and pay for the books, they walk to the car, and Ray drove over to the Mall. They went inside Ray wanted to buy her a new comforter, and some things for her room. Jessie picked out a comforter, and some sheets, and she walked over looking at a picture frame with photo, and Ray walked up behind her.
"Oh Marilyn Monroe, do you like her"?
"Yes she is beautiful "
"Would you like this for your room it would go with your comforter, and maybe we will paint your room soon too"
"Ray your doing to much already"
Ray grabbed the photo, and smiled as he handed it to the lady to cash it in. They left the store, and Ray ran out putting the stuff in the truck while Jessie was looking in a video store. Ray told her to pick up a few , and she grabbed a few of her favourites, and Ray paid, and they left. They went to the Drugstore, and got some stuff, and than they left to go to the Diner.
They went inside, and Jessie loved the music but she laughed it was all country, and everyone was wearing cowboy hats, and jeans. They sat at a booth, and Ray ordered them both hamburgers, fries, and a order of onion rings. He also ordered a beer for himself he would only have one, and she had a diet cola. The Waitress brought the food, and Jessie was eating, it was the first time in days she seemed to enjoy eating again. They were watching people dancing, and Jessie was daydreaming about Ray asking her to dance, and she knew it wasn't going to happen. She was enjoying herself until a beautiful lady walked over with long black hair, and she touched Ray's shoulder, and gave him a kiss on the lips.
Jessie was shocked she was staring when Ray smiled, and got up giving her a hug.
"Hey Barb I haven't seen you around here in months where is Phil"?
"Phil is a jerk, it is over between us"
Ray smiled, "Really you basically called me a jerk Barb so why are you here"?
"I can see your happy to see me, I bet you miss my attention Cowboy"
"He never mentioned your name so you would lose that bet". Jessie said
Ray smiled, "Jessie was that nice"?
"Maybe not but did you forget I'm sitting here Ray"?
"Sorry your right this is Jessie, and this is Barb a old friend"
Barb smiled, "Sweetie isn't it past your bedtime"
Ray got up, "Barb I will call you sometime I'm here having dinner with Jessie"
"I can come by your place tonight after you drop off your friend"
"I live with Ray " Jessie said, and Barb smiled, "Ray your not serious she is a child"
Jessie jumped up, "I'm not a child I wish people can see that".
Ray threw some money on the table, and grabbed Jessie's arm, and said they were going home. Jessie grabbed her bag, and they left as Barb watched them. Jessie got in the truck, she knew Ray was angry, she knew she was going to be in trouble, but she didn't understand what was going on with her. She was angry, she was jealous, but why?
Ray got in the truck, and stared at Jessie, making her look at him.
'What was that in there"?
"I don't know"
"You don't know she is someone from my past, but you acted rude"
"I'm sorry"
"You should be this whole day is ruined". Ray started the truck, and was driving, Jessie was looking out the window, she was holding back tears. She finally whispered, "I was jealous Ray, I was happy, and she came over, and ruined it"
Ray was shocked, but he whispered, "What do you mean"?
"I was happy, I was happy with you, and I felt so mad when she was touching you , and treating me like a child"
"Oh Jessie"
"I don't know what is wrong with me". Jessie started to cry, and Ray pulled over, and whispered, "I'm sorry I never should have yelled at you, and I was having a great time today, and I promise you, there is nothing between me, and Barb that is so over"
Jessie smiled as Ray gave her a hug, and whispered, "Lets go home, and watch one of those movies you picked"
"OK". They were driving home, and they were quiet, but Ray could see maybe Jessie was starting to get feeling for him, and he had to admit he was having feelings for her too, but he knew what others might think, and it scared him.
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Post by Sanda on Jul 10, 2012 22:50:06 GMT -6
Great update Jessie. Jessie and Ray are so cute and adorable together in this story. OMG I felt bad for Jessie when Ray's old flame came over and visited with them at the diner while they were eating dinner.
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Post by melindajo2000 on Jul 11, 2012 9:45:03 GMT -6
great update, I am glad that Ray and Jessie are starting to realize their feelings, great job!
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Post by jessie on Jul 11, 2012 18:40:45 GMT -6
Chapter 19
Jessie and Ray got home, and Ray grabbed the bags, and Jessie helped. They went inside, and Ray walked Jessie stuff to her room, and put it down.
Jessie followed putting her bag on the bed, and sat down.
Ray smiled, "I will hang the picture tomorrow, would you like to watch a movie"?
"Yes but I feel horrible, I had no right to do what I did, and I'm so ashamed of myself"
Ray walked over sitting beside her, and whispered, "You have been through so much so I think it is understandable, and Barb was kind of rude too"
"It was me, I don't have any right to think you have to give up a date with someone else, to spend time with me"
"I would rather spend time with you Jessie, I had fun today, and I kind wish she didn't spoil it coming over"
"What do you see in her , I know she is beautiful but she is kind of fake"
"Fake why would you say that Jessie"?
"I don't know she reminds me of those ladies in the movies that think men will fall all over them because of their pretty hair, and flirty clothes"
"Well she is beautiful but that isn't everything a man would love"
"Yeah right Ray"
"Jessie is there something bothering you"?
"My head is all confused, I have these feelings inside, I don't understand"
"Would you like me to get Miss Ellie, or Pam to talk to you"?
"No I want to talk to you"
Ray smiled, "Oh someone has a temper"
"I don't have a temper, but your laughing at me, and this is serious to me"
"OK I'm listening tell me what is wrong"?
"My whole life I was thrown from Foster care to foster care, and each one was worse than the last one, but I thought I finally found someone who cared, and when I lost my Foster Mom everything went so bad, and hearing it was all my fault got to me. I never did anything wrong, my Foster Dad said he was getting tired of me, and I heard him talking to a friend. They were talking about a trade in, and I knew what they meant, he was going to give me to someone else, and I knew I would die, and I finally got the courage to run. I stayed 3 years, and I did tell but no one believe me, but who would allow the abuse for 3 years? You helped me, and I feel like the first time in my whole life someone cares for me, and someone loves me, but not in a sick way. I feel special with you, and I feel like I belong here like this is where I am meant to be, but everyone keeps saying you shouldn't help me, but they are wrong. I know if I leave here I will never survive, and when I saw you with this lady tonight I thought everything was going to go away, and I was going to be left all alone again, and it scared me to death".
Ray reached over touching her cheek, and whispered, "I love having you here, and I would never push you away"
"Ray I'm so scared"
"No one will hurt you Jessie there is nothing to be scared of "
Ray couldn't resist himself but he moved close kissing her, and she kissed him back. Ray got up, "I will go change, pick a movie". Ray couldn't get away fast enough he knew everything was going so fast, and he needed to slow down a bit.
Jessie got up going to the closet, and changed, and put on her pajamas, and her housecoat, she grabbed the movies, and went out to the living room to see Ray.
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Post by Sanda on Jul 11, 2012 18:49:16 GMT -6
Great update Jessie. I loved the talk between Ray and Jessie in this chapter. Ray and Jessie are so cute and adorable together in this story.
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Post by jessie on Jul 13, 2012 1:11:43 GMT -6
Chapter 20
Jessie went in the kitchen, and grabbed a bag of chips, and a beer for Ray, and a cola for herself. She brought the tray out to the living room, and smiled when Ray walked into the living room.
"I got you a beer, and we can have some chips if you like"
"Sure what movie did you pick"?
"This one"
Ray smiled, "Love story do you have any idea how sad this is"?
"My Foster Mom loved this movie it was sad, but it was so amazing the man in the story was so kind taking care of her, and he loved her, she did die but she didn't die alone, she died knowing someone loved her"
"Oh God maybe we should watch something different like a comedy"
"I didn't buy a comedy"
"OK put this on"
"Are you mad at me"?
"No I'm tried actually"
"If you don't want to watch a movie you don't have to, I just thought you wanted to"
"I thought I could stay awake but I'm beat, I'm going to take my beer to my room, but you watch it". Ray kissed her cheek, and grabbed his beer, and said goodnight, and walked down the hall. Jessie was shocked, she walked over putting the movie in, and sat on the couch, and grabbed the pillow. The movie started she was watching the TV but she knew Ray was upset over the kiss, and she knew it was her fault. She started to cry, she wiped the tears from her eyes, and grabbed the chips, and opened the bag. She was watching the movie trying to forget what happened earlier, when someone grabbed the chips out of her hand. She jumped, but turned seeing Ray standing behind her.
"You ever hear it isn't healthy eating chips all alone, you will eat the whole bag"
"I was planning on it, I thought you were tired"
"Jessie can I turn this film off for a minute, can we just talk"
Jessie got up turning it off, she walked over sitting in the chair looking at the floor.
"Why are you sitting way over there"?
"I know your angry, I know I am driving you crazy, your about to tell me you think I should leave"
"Come sit by me please"
Jessie got up, and walked over sitting beside Ray, but didn't look at him.
"You really think I'm about to ask you to leave"?
"I don't know one minute you were going to watch a movie with me, the next you were to tired, I don't get you Ray"
"I'm freaking out Jessie you have been through so much, and I know your hurting, and confused, but every time I kiss you, I don't want to stop do you understand what I'm saying"?
"You want to keep kissing me that would be OK"
"Jessie you are so sweet no I'm a man who finds you so darn attractive, I want more, and I know your not ready"
Jessie grabbed her soda , and was drinking he could see she was blushing , and he touched her arm.
"Ray I'm not ready for that, but does that mean you want me to be like a girlfriend"
"Yeah I guess it does we will take it slow but that means you are mine, and I'm yours, and I will wait as long as you need, but are you sure you want someone like me Jessie. I have had many women, I don't have a great track record keeping them, and I'm known to be a jerk at times, and I don't like to share like I want this whole bag of chips to myself. If you want that kind of guy in your life, well I'm here for you"
Jessie whispered, "You are amazing Ray the sweetest , most amazing man, or person I have ever talked to. I'm not good enough for you, and I'm so afraid I will never be ready to have sex, I hated it"
"You didn't make love Jessie he raped you. Rape is nothing to do with making love it is a violent disgusting act, and he hurt you in the worst way. I promise you when your ready, and it is the right time, I will show you what love is all about, and I promise you it is nothing like what he did to you"
"Ray does that mean you can't snuggle with me at night, I like that but can you handle that"?
Ray smiled, "I will try but it will be hard, but you know what I like having someone close by, I especially love when you snore"
"I do not snore do I"?
"Oh yes like a man"
"Oh God that is gross"
"I'm just kidding you don't snore but you make this little noise that is so adorable it sounds like a little bird"
"You lie"
Ray made the noise, and Jessie laughed as she snuggled close, and he wrapped his arm around her, and he flipped the movie on. She felt so safe in his arms, and she knew people might say their relationship is wrong, but she didn't care, she knew she could make Ray happy but she had to deal with the issues of the rape, the thought of making love scared her to death, she remembers all the pain, and the shame, but she knew Ray would not hurt her, but she still was not ready, but someday she would be.
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Post by Sanda on Jul 13, 2012 1:19:09 GMT -6
Great update Jessie. Ray and Jessie are so cute and adorable together in this story. I feel so bad for everything that Jessie has been because of her foster father.
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Post by melindajo2000 on Jul 13, 2012 16:38:48 GMT -6
good chapter, I am glad they decided they want to be together
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Post by jessie on Jul 13, 2012 19:55:20 GMT -6
Chapter 21
2 months have past
Ray was in the Stables grooming some of the horses. He felt someone come up behind him, and touch his back.
"Hey you have you cleaned all the stalls already Jessie"
"Yes Ray , and I fed them too"
Ray got up, "Great I am finished up in here we can go soon"
"Ray my feet are killing me"
"You can have a warm bath when you get home"
Jessie smiled as Ray touched her cheek, and she touched his hand as Jock walked into the Stables.
"Oh sorry what is going on here"?
"Nothing Sir we are finished up working we started at 5am, so we are going home soon". Jessie smiled as she ran to put some stuff away as Jock smiled, and looked at Ray.
"She seems happy she is doing better"?
"Much better"
"What I came here for this week is the Oil's Barron's Ball , I'm nominated this year. I would love for you to come, you can bring a date but maybe Jessie can come with you"
"I would love to come , and yes I would be bringing Jessie. I have something to tell you Jock, I have been getting closer to Jessie , but we are taking it slow"
"You both are getting serious"?
"Yes she is amazing, I'm falling in love with her Jock"
Jock smiled, "She is a keeper don't mess it up boy"
"I won't sir thank you for inviting me to the Ball"
"Well I want you there"
Jessie ran over, "I put everything away, can we get going soon Ray"
"Yes Jessie go jump in the truck, I will be right there"
"OK goodbye Mr. Ewing"
"Goodbye but remember call me Jock or Grandpa"
"I like Grandpa". Jessie hugged him, and than left to go to the truck. Jock said goodbye to Ray, and left. Ray closed up, and walked over to the truck, and got in.
"Lets go home"
They drove home, and got out, and they walked up to the house. Jessie took her shoes off, and walked over to the couch, and laid down.
"You really are tired go take a bath, and lay down for a little while, I will make dinner tonight"
"No I will that is my job"
Ray smiled walking over sitting on the couch, and he lifted Jessie's feet on his lap, and was rubbing them. Jessie giggled making Ray laugh.
"You don't like your feet rubbed"?
"Yes it feels so good"
Ray smiled as Jessie shut her eyes, and he continued to rub her feet.
"Oh Ray you have the most amazing hands, I love it"
Ray smiled as Jessie sat up, and Ray whispered, "You are way to cute"
Jessie touched his face, and Ray pulled her close kissing her. She snuggled close, and he whispered, "I have a special surprise for you Jessie"
"A surprise "
"Yes Jock invited me to the Oil Barron's Ball this Friday. He said I can bring a date, and I told him, I'm bringing my girl"
Jessie smiled, "Me"
"Yes if you like to go "
"A Ball what will I wear"?
" A pretty dress that we will go out tomorrow to buy"
" I would love to go with you Ray" She smiled as he pulled her close, and they kissed.
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Post by melindajo2000 on Jul 13, 2012 20:07:12 GMT -6
i'm glad Jessie gets to go to the oil barron's ball, good job
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Post by Sanda on Jul 13, 2012 20:24:22 GMT -6
Cute update Jessie. Ray and Jessie are so cute and adorable together in this story. I am so happy that they are going to go the Oil Baron's Ball together.
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Post by jessie on Jul 15, 2012 1:03:39 GMT -6
Chapter 21
Ray smiled, "Go get a quick bath, and I will call you when Dinner is ready"
"Ray it is my job to cook for you"
"I want to, I will make something quick, and we can maybe watch some TV after"
Jessie got up, and walked down the hall, and Ray got up going into the kitchen looking in the fridge to see what they had. He decided he was going to order pizza, he didn't feel like cooking. He grabbed a beer, and was reading the paper, and finally got up picking up the phone, and calling the pizza place. He hung up when he heard Jessie come out wearing her housecoat, and white socks, and he had to laugh she looked so cute.
"Ray you ordered pizza"
"Yeah we deserve it we had a long day we both worked so hard"
Jessie smiled as he walked over touching her cheek, and she looked at him, and he moved down giving her a kiss.
"Ray I should go change for dinner"
"Why you look comfy"
"I am"
Ray knew it has been over 2 months since Jessie has been here, and he knew she was still shy, and a little scared but he lifted her into his arms sitting her on the counter, and kissed her making her touch his chest, and he stopped.
"You are still not ready"?
"Ray I'm scared"
"Of me"
"No I can't explain it"
Ray moved away, "I'm going to shower the money is on the counter for the pizza, I will be out in a minute".
Ray walked away, and Jessie jumped off the counter, and yelled out.
"Stop don't be angry, I'm trying, I know I'm frustrating you, but I'm scared"
"I know , I'm sorry, I will never do that again"
Ray walked down the hall, and Jessie was staring, she felt cold inside, she knew she was going to lose Ray, but she was angry he didn't understand. She sat at the table, and wiped tears from her cheek as she remembered what happened to her, and she hated that she was letting her past ruin any chance of a future, but she also hated that Ray was pressuring her he said he would wait, and she felt 2 months was not that long, if he really cared for her he would be patient. She heard someone knock at the door, she got up, and grabbed the money, and walked to the door. She handed the man the money, and tipped him, and took the pizza. She walked over to the cupboard, and pulled down one plate, and she grabbed him a beer, and set his table up, and than she walked to her room, and went inside, and shut the light off, and walked over getting in bed, and pulled the blanket up, and laid there feeling sick to her stomach. She hated that one moment she was so happy, and the next she felt like she was dying inside, she wondered if life would ever be good for her. She screamed into the pillow, and shut her eyes, she wanted to forget this day, and she wondered if maybe she should leave Ray, and try to make it on her own.
Ray came out of the shower, he put on a fresh pair of jeans, and a t-shirt, and walked out going into the kitchen. He saw the table set up for one, and the pizza. He opened it up, and knew she didn't eat. He felt horrible he closed the pizza, and walked down the hall, and knocked on her door.
"Go away I'm tired Ray"
"I'm coming in Jessie "
"Go away"
Ray pushed the door open, and Jessie screamed at him.
"I said I want to be alone"
"I know your angry, and I don't blame you"
"You said you would wait, I guess 2 months is as long as you will wait"
"Jessie I'm a man, I'm trying but what you went through was horrible, and I feel so bad for you, but you will never get past it if you push me away every time I touch you"
"I'm scared I don't want to get hurt again"
"I wouldn't hurt you if you think I would maybe this is a mistake"
"You have no idea what it felt like, I hated myself, I felt dirty, and I am afraid I will never trust a man not to hurt me, and I hate it"
Ray walked over, "I was wrong pressuring you, but I'm falling in love with you, and I want to help you forget what that animal did"
"I will never forget" Jessie started to cry, and Ray touched her cheek, and whispered, "Please trust me Jessie, I will never hurt you"
Jessie was shaking, but she whispered, "I trust you". She touched his cheek as he laid her back, and kissed her, but she shaking , and Ray whispered, "I will stop if you want me to"
Jessie eyes filled up with tears as she whispered, "Don't stop".
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Post by Sanda on Jul 15, 2012 1:08:01 GMT -6
Great update Jessie. Poor Jessie. I don't blame Jessie for being scared after everything that monster did to her.
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Post by melindajo2000 on Jul 15, 2012 11:10:51 GMT -6
great update it is understandable Jessie is scared, hope Ray will be patient, good job
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Post by jessie on Jul 15, 2012 15:45:12 GMT -6
Chapter 22
Ray was looking into her eyes, she was staring but he could see she was scared, and he felt her trembling under him.
"Jessie calm down, are you even breathing"
Jessie smiled but a tear rolled down her cheek, and he wiped it away, and kissed her cheek, but whispered, "I love you for this Jessie". He jumped up, and smiled telling her to come eat with him.
"Ray what are you doing"?
"Your not ready I'm not doing this to you, I will wait as long as it takes"
"Oh I will try I'm just scared, but I will do anything for you"
"No I was wrong I have never wanted anyone the way I want you. I don't want you to do anything that you will regret after, I want to wait until the time is perfect, and this isn't that time"
"Your angry at me"
He reached over holding her face in his hands, and whispered, "No I think you are adorable, and what you were willing to do for me I will never forget"
"He said men would only want me for one thing, and that was sex, he said I was lousy at it too. I smacked him for saying it, but he hurt me bad. I can't wear a pretty dress like in the movies, everyone will see what he did to me"
Ray sat down looking at her, and she pulled down her housecoat enough to show him, Ray suddenly felt ill, and ran to the bathroom, and was violently sick. He was livid he wanted to go to this man, and kill him. Jessie walked into the bathroom, and whispered, "How am I going to forget when he left me with the scars to remind me everyday what happened."
"Is that cigarette burns on your back"
"Yes he liked doing that he said he would make sure no man would ever want me, and it is true I made you sick".
"No not you what he did to you"
Jessie turned away, and Ray wrapped his arms around her, and pulled her close as she cried, and let out a scream that shot shivers throughout his whole body. She slide to the floor Ray was still holding her rocking her. She was crying but he kept saying over, and over.
"I promise you I will make you feel safe again". She finally calmed down, and Ray lifted her up, and carried her to the bed, and laid her down. He laid behind her holding her close, as she shut her eyes, but she held on to his hands, and whispered, "Don't leave me Ray"
"Never Angel, I love you".
Jessie turned, and whispered, "I love you too"
Ray smiled, "Have a little nap, than we can have our pizza OK"
"It will get cold"
"I will heat it up don't worry"
Jessie shut her eyes, and she fell asleep, and Ray shut his eyes as he felt tears coming, but he put his hand over his eyes, he had to hold it in, but the thought of what this man did to her haunts him, and he knew she needed him more than ever, he just hoped he could help her through this ordeal, maybe she really did need professional help.
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